Top 10 Dumb Things Freshmen Say

by Dave Reuss

This is a list compiled by MSU juniors and seniors of dumb things freshmen say. It is far from exhaustive and does not apply to everyone. These are just trends we see on a daily basis that make us think, “Wow! We were once freshmen too.” We’ve all been there and do not blame you for your stupidity. Most of us grew out of it and we sincerely believe you will do the same. But for now, embrace the ending of your first semester of college and try not to yell these things too often.

                                           

10. Does it get like, REALLY cold here?

This question still astounds me… why yes, it does get really cold. We’re in the Rocky Mountains; of course it gets really cold.

9. Exactly how “mandatory” are these “mandatory floor meetings”?

Nothing shouts “independent college student” like a room full of uncomfortable and confused people being told that smoking out of the dorm windows is not acceptable behavior. The truth is, these meetings could not be less mandatory, it’s just the RA’s desperate attempt to retain some sort of power and superiority.

8. My 8am class isn’t even that important.

This rationalization comes around the third week of school. You started out an ambitious and well-to-do college student. But as the late nights add up, that early morning class just doesn’t hold the same weight it used to. Sure, you could walk to class in your sweats through the cold wind, or you could curl up in your cozy blankets and nice warm pillow. Do the right thing.

7. Dude, I got so drunk last weekend.

Now, I’m not judging your lifestyle—if that’s what you want to do, I don’t really care. However, you’re probably 18 years old. The people who are worth impressing on campus honestly don’t care about your underage, drunken escapades.

6. Let’s make popcorn!

This is a dangerous statement in dorm-room life. Making popcorn at midnight, going to talk to your friend—thus forgetting about the popping process—will make you the most hated person, especially if the smoke enveloping your room causes the fire alarm to go off.

5. Look at the cool lanyards we get for free!

 Oh yes, you know which one I’m talking about—the one you get from ResLife when you first move in. Yes, this may be a good way to not lose your key and lock yourself out over and over, but you’re labeling yourself as freshman. Invest in a new one; it’ll be the best $4.95 you spend in a long time.

                                     

4. I don’t need to study.

Appreciate the good days, because believe me, they will change. But hey, you may actually be super smart, who am I to be the judge of that? Don’t be that person though that brags about your intellect whether it’s legitimate or feigned. Learning to study effectively now will help you when you reach your 35-page capstone research project.

3. There’s nothing to do.

This one makes me cringe. There’s so much to do here all year round and you don’t even have to be 21. Hiking, biking, camping, knitting, watching a Bobcats game, joining a club, and stargazing on a golf course are all acceptable activities. Make friends, go do something, and don’t be afraid to feel a little ridiculous. We are in college after all—it’s allowed. For more info on what to do and what's going on, check out the digital edition.  

2. I don’t ski.

Ski Town USA (AKA Bozeman) is one of the most renowned places for outdoor recreation in the entire world. Surrounded by mountains, Bozeman is prime ski/snowboard territory. You mean to tell me you live here and never get outside? I get that some people just don’t like it, have had bad experiences, or are broke. However, if you don’t ski because you’re scared or have “better things to do,” you should be ashamed to say you live here.

1. YOLO!

Ok, have you ever heard anyone over the age of 20 say this seriously? Probably not. “You Only Live Once” is probably the most annoying acronym since “JK.” Please, I’m begging you! Don’t be that annoying freshman.

Underage Entertainment

Looking to have fun, but a house full of sloppy drunks just isn’t your scene? Fear not—Bozeman is packed with activities that will have you enjoying yourself without those pesky fines, hours of community service, and the 5-0.

SOB Barn

This building has been sitting on campus for generations and its unique wood-floor loft makes for a great place to get down, with all kinds of clubs congregating here for a variety of styles. From swing dancing to international folk, Scottish country dancing to hoola-hooping, it’s a much easier and cleaner way to meet fun people than over a loud tipsy bar grind, anyway—it’s flirty, it’s fun, and it’s free.

The Bowl

Newly renovated and the ready for action, the Bowl is Bozeman’s only actual alley. This being the case, the lanes are generally packed with people—join a league with some friends to guarantee a spot. With a huge variety of snacks and non-alcoholic drinks, the Bowl is the place to be. Plus, chicks dig bowlers—that’s a fact. (Another fact: p. 83 of the 2012-13 MSU Pocket Guide has a 2-for-1 coupon.)

Sizzling Salsa

Have you ever wanted to turn heads on the dance floor with your mind-blowing moves? Well, here is your chance. Every Wednesday, the Movement Arts Center (off S. 19th where Kagy ends) hosts a night of salsa lessons and open dance. It starts at 8pm and at a price of only $3, why wouldn’t you give it a shot? sizzlingsalsamt.com and themacmontana.com.

Procrastinator Theatre

Located in SUB 287, this student-run theater offers two shows each night of the week except for Wednesday. These cinematic adventures are usually straight out of the theaters and are very cheap— only $2 a ticket. And don’t forget about Erotique Night every Thursday (when tickets are only $1), featuring a late-night show and sexy giveaways. montana.edu/asmsu/procrastinator.html.

Zebra and Mixers

Every once in a while, these bars host a 17+ show. Keep an eye out for posters around town, and be sure to check their Facebook pages to keep up with events and showtimes. zebracocktaillounge.com, mixersclub.com.

SUB Rec Center

This is a place most people seem to forget about. This little hole in the wall is packed with games: Playstation 3, pool tables, and bowling—just to name a few. Don’t forget about “Combust-a-Bowl” every Friday and Saturday night, featuring colorful lights and energizing music. For just $5 an hour, you can do almost anything in the Rec Room. If you are really pinching pennies, be sure to go to happy hour, Monday through Thursday from 3-6pm, when everything’s around a dollar off. It’s alcohol-free and they’ve got all kinds of good snacks and drinks. (And don’t miss out on their best-kept secret: the SUB Underground music venue in the basement hosts great local musicians.)

Norris Hot Springs

Ready to get your soak on? Just a short drive southwest will take you to these natural hot springs. Every Friday, Saturday, and Sunday night from 7-10pm they host a variety of acoustic and Americana music. The musicians jam in “the dome”: a wind-resistant stage where they can perform year-round for soakers. At $7 to listen to live music and enjoy the water, you would be hard-pressed to find a better deal. They even have a safe driver program: each designated driver for carloads of three or more gets a free soak pass to use on the next visit. What a steal!

Top 10 Car-Camping Spots

It's that time of year again: crisp air and cool mornings mean the last days of good camping weather are upon us. So after class this Friday, grab your gear, pack up the car, pick up some friends and head out for a weekend in the good ol' Big Sky country. Here's a list of spots to hit before the snow comes down.

1. Canyon Ferry Lake, south of Helena

Pull your Subaru up to the bank and prepare for a weekend relaxing in folding chairs—Canyon Ferry is a multifaceted recreational destination. Set up your spinning rods, break out the barbeque, and daydream about a fresh walleye dinner. You can scout the area's great cliff-jumping areas for when you come back in the summer months.

2. Fairy Lake Campground, northern Bridgers
Take some buddies and trek up to Sacajewea, chill on the shores of the lake with a good book, shoot the breeze, or scope out the rope swing and try to dare one of your friends into taking the plunge. Be prepared though; it's a long drive back into town.

3. Squaw Creek, Gallatin Canyon
Some of the most breathtaking sites can be seen just steps away from your truck, car, or tent at the top of Castle Mountain and Garnet Peak. Looking to climb? Just a short walk away, Scorched Earth and The Cave have some great climbing routes and stay warm in the afternoon.

4. Madison River, Ennis/Norris
 Ever read Huckleberry Finn? There's a reason they stayed on the river so long. Scaling Neat Rock, working on your cast, hiking the Bear Trap, and an apres-outdoor soak at Norris Hot Springs. This is the life.

5. Greek Creek, Gallatin Canyon
There is no place greater to catch a break than here. Take it easy while listening to the Gallatin gurgle down the canyon. Fish in Yellowstone Park for the day with friends, head south and catch an IMAX movie in West Yellowstone, or devour some onion rings at the Corral Bar.

6. Yellowstone National Park
The first of its kind never ceases to amaze. Take a dip in the Boiling River, run alongside the buffalo in the Lamar Valley, or take a hike up Slough Creek with your favorite fly rod. The best part? No traffic jams of summer tourists in taking pictures of bears and moose out their Winnebagos.

7. Yankee Jim Canyon, Gardiner
What's better than paradise? Paradise with a cheeseburger. Set up camp and head to Helen’s in Gardiner to work on your belly. Head back to camp and lie next to the churning rapids of the Yellowstone. Take your chalk bag and crash pad for some nearby bouldering.

8. Pine Creek, Livingston
 A little bit of music will always ease you into a nice slumber. Catch some live music at the Pine Creek Café and wake up curled nice a tight in your sleeping bag, ready to take in a hike to the picturesque Pine Creek Lake. Bring your rod. The Cutthroats are waiting.

9. Colter, Cooke City
 Wouldn't you love to trek into the Beartooth Wilderness without humping a 50-pound pack? Car-camp it at the Colter campground and rise with the sun to get a jump start on a day hike into this rugged alpine environment. Leave the whiskey at home; these majestic mountains deserve to be seen without the hangover haze.

10. Hyalite Recreation Area, Bozeman
Just a short journey from town lands you in this pristine paradise. You can choose from three campgrounds to start from. Mountain bike to the breathtaking Emerald Lake, trail run up Hyalite Peak, or take a trip around the reservoir in your canoe. This is car-camping at its finest. Casual, midday starts are expected and Town & Country is only a 20-minute drive away in case you run out of food.

This blog post is adapted from an article published in Outside Bozeman, Summer 2006, by Becky Edwards.

Halloween at MSU: Costumes and Events on the Cheap

Parading around in the best costume can be difficult as a college student—since you have around $20 to your name. How can you possibly show up your friends and colleagues when you can’t afford the new Iron Man MKIII armor? I’ll tell you how.

First off, you don’t need to do all of your shopping at places like Spirit Halloween, Wal-Mart, or K-Mart. Sure, these stores have everything you could possibly need to blow away the competition, but then you have to decide if the cost of looking good for Halloween is worth skipping a semester of school. (Oh, it is? I’m sure your parents will understand.)

It’s time to get creative. Luckily, Bozeman is chock-full of places to get awesome costumes at great prices. They probably won’t have Batman’s utility belt, but you can still put together a costume that will have your friends in a dumbfounded stupor.

• ·      Sacks Thrift Store
• ·      Nu2u Thift
• ·      Head West
• ·      Community Closet
• ·      Catwalk
• ·      Goodwill
• ·      Second Hand Rose
• ·      Re-Couture Boutique

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For more info on these stores, check out pages 32-33 in the MSU Pocket Guide.

If you’re really short on cash, your dorm room has tons of hidden treasures. There are endless possibilities if you put your mind to it. First, you’ve got your basics:

• ·      Cowboy
• ·      Zombie
• ·      Gangster
• ·      Homeless Guy
• ·      Nerd
• ·      Your “Favorite” Professor

If you’re still not sure, mix and match different ideas.

• ·      Toilet paper can easy transform you into a ghoulish mummy.
• ·      An old umbrella can be cut into bat-like wings and ears.
• ·      Your girlfriend’s make-up bag holds countless treasures for making fake cuts, bruises, and discoloration for that will make your zombie outfit come to life!
• ·      Old cardboard boxes, duct tape, CDs, and literally anything else you can think of can be combined make a killer robot costume.
• ·      Using a sleeping bag and duct tape, turn yourself into a caterpillar.

If you have a lot of outdoor gear on your hands, you can sure use that too!

• ·      Snowboarder/Skiier
• ·      Rock Climber
• ·      Lumberjack
• ·      Long-Distance Runner (short shorts and headband of course)
• ·      Hunter*
• ·      Fisherman*

*It’s probably a bad idea to bring guns to costume parties. Also be wary of fishing poles with hooks on them.

After you put together the perfect outfit, where are you going to go? Parties are always fun, but there are plenty of equally fun alternatives.

You and your friends can always head to the Procrastinator Theater on the 30th or 31st at 8pm for the annual screening of the Rocky Horror Picture Show. Admission to the movie is one can of food (if you’re wearing a costume—two without).

If you’re not particular to singing transvestites, you can always head off-campus and engage in what Bozeman has to offer.

• ·      The Voodoo Ball 2: This 18+ event is a giant zombie-themed dancefest held at the Emerson Ballroom on the 29th.
• ·      Freaker's Ball: It’s a dance party at the Zebra Cocktail Lounge from 8pm-2am. $9 in advance or $12 at the door.
• ·      Compound Productions Halloween Bash: A 21+ costume party held at the Filling Station on the 29th.

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For more info on these events, check out this website.

So sure, you can spend the money and get that super-realistic Master Chief outfit—or you can go party it up and have a night on the town in your completely unique costume and leave a wake of amazement behind you… all while maintaining that precious wallet full of cash. 

Pep-Rally Perceptions

Ah the joys of fall football season—the sound of the band, swishing pom poms, and even the smell of game-day barbecues. There is, however, one aspect to football season that I’ve never been accustomed to—the homecoming pep rally.

Because I’d never been to a pep rally, I took my friend Whitney, who is undoubtedly the biggest Bobcat football fan ever to have graced the Gallatin Valley. Seriously, this girl has been to every home game in the past three years, and she even wore a Bobcats sticker tattoo on her face for two days straight. Now that’s commitment.

Before approaching the pep rally, I couldn’t help but stop at the downtown Co-op to buy coconut water. I’ve recently learned to embrace the inner hippie-esque attitude that Bozeman has instilled in me after three years of living here.

Once we arrived, organic beverages in hand, the energy of the crowd overwhelmed us. The hyper-enthusiastic cheerleaders and dance team bounced around while the Spirit of the West Marching Band played music from the Phantom of the Opera. An admitted musical nerd, I was highly entertained by their song selection. After chasing down our mascot, Champ, for an obligatory Bobcat pride picture, we mingled our way through the crowd to view the front part of the stage.

It was there that I saw something I’ll unfortunately never forget. All the 2012 Homecoming court candidates made their way to the stage, and "Single Ladies" by Beyoncé started playing over the speakers. The four guys were dancing to "Single Ladies"… this is a sight I could have lived without.

Through all the excitement and loud cheers, I did notice something I wasn’t expecting. The crowd at the pep rally wasn’t just students—community members and their children were there as well. Both old and new generations of Bobcats were all together supporting our university. It was then I realized how proud I really am to be a Bobcat and I wasn’t afraid to shout out cheers for the Cats. Turns out these homecoming pep-rally things really do work after all!

Are you a Bozemanite?

Whether this is your first year at MSU or your fifth, the question inevitably arises: are you a true Bozemanite? Take our quiz to find out if Bozeman is really the place for you.

1. Do you plan your class schedule so that you can make it up to the ski hill at least three days a week?

2. In the fall and spring, do you wear shorts underneath snow pants, to be prepared for any kind of weather?

3. Do you know at least three dogs names Bridger or Madison, and maybe one or two people?

4. Do you understand what the Barmuda triangle means?

5. Do you wait until July to remove your snow tires?

6. Do you start ski training in August?

7. Do you eat ramen all year so that you can afford outdoor gear?

8. Are cuts, bruises, and abrasions a source of endless story-telling rather than intolerable pain?

9. Have you worn Birkenstocks or Chacos with socks?

10. Does a “study day” involve throwing a couple books into your pack and heading up to the hill, whether it be to hike or ski?

11. Have you gone skiing every month of the year?

12. Have you danced the night away at Music on Main?

13. Have you guided your car through a cattle drive on a state highway?

14. Do you drive a Subaru?

15. Have you gotten up before dawn to go fishing?

16. Have you entered in at least one of Outside Bozeman’s contests in an attempt to score awesome gear?

17. Do you float the Madison or Jefferson every summer?

18. Have you watched live music at Norris Hot Springs while your hair forms icicles?

19. Have you gone extreme sledding down Peets Hill, sans helmet and knee pads?

20. Do you chuckle good-naturedly at the antics of obvious out-of-staters, calling them “tourons”?

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0 points: What the heck are you doing here? If all you do is study and sleep, might as well be in Kansas or Nebraska.

1-6 points: You’re not a total loser, but you are pretty pathetic. Throw away the Valium, wipe the slobber off your chin, and explore this awesome town we call home.

7-13 points: Not a bad start, but you’ve got plenty of work to do. Keep doing what you’re doing; if you need some guidance, check out the MSU Pocket Guide and Outside Bozeman magazine.

14-20 points: Congratulations, you’re a Bozemanite! Now, the bad news: you’ll never be able to leave this awesome place, and for the rest of your life, envious house guests will take over your living room every summer and winter.